Daily Archives: February 15, 2011

GEM COLLECTION, MAX BARRY WRITING

FEBRUARY 15 2011 : Day No 46: So hot the hens are laying hard boiled eggs.

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http://www.listology.com/stumpyverfo/list/stumpys-favorite-southern-sayings

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GEM COLLECTION TOPIC :  HYPERBOLE AND SUCH

MAX BARRY TECHNIQUE NO 2 :  WORD CEILING

And setting the word limit at 250 words before looking online for some other gems like

So hot the hens are laying hard boiled eggs.

Its easy for me to go to the hyperbole. The MOST. The BIGGEST. The WORST. The BEST. I have learned not to do that as much. I am sitting here at my table in front of the big windows and the weather is moderate and the skies are softly clouded. I have one chook here. I have been told it’s a Rhode Island Red.  It’s the cheekiest chook “ I have ever met”. It survived the fox attacks which took another 5 hens. Now the cats and dogs are afraid of it. So are we. We close the screen doors and dash past her. She’s back in the coop now.

The little black lady in the picture above used to come visiting when we lived in the village of Ulmarra in the Clarence Valley. She was very dainty and liked to roam the street. I have noted recently that I have never seen a  chook as road kill despite often seeing them beside the Highway. I would not have thought a Chook to be so intelligent. We say “ as silly as a wet hen” but I don’t think avoiding foxes and large trucks on busy highways is a sign of silliness.

In Ulmarra, it was often so hot that to see a chook laying hard boiled eggs would not have surprised me – much.

It hasn’t been as hot as that here this year. Today its cold for me and my legs seem unable to hold me up.

It’s So Hot in Arizona That

  • the cows are giving evaporated milk.
 SO HOT

It was so cold . . .
pickpockets were sticking their hands in strangers’ pockets just to keep them warm!

 SO COLD

I was so poor
Santa gave me food
I was so poor
I could only afford used money

 SO POOR