LOOKING THROUGH THE EYES OF HEROIN.
THE YAAN : I had a disturbing dream the night before last night. Rare for me. One of this nature is so rare that I don’t recall having had one in 24 years. It was about injecting heroin. It disturbed me and got me out of bed before sunrise and watching for the dawn. Times like that, grabbing onto beauty is one salvation for me.
This morning is a different matter. I slept well and deeply and woke undisturbed by visions past. Its raining and the lawns are mown. the paddock slashed. The kookaburra is swooping for worms. A touch of Autumn is with us.
This is my 25th year away from heroin. I spent years looking through those eyes. I saw many things in those years that other people never see. The thing is – I missed more than I saw. I lay in a world distorted chemically and missed out on seeing the world through the eyes I use now.
I prefer to look through my own eyes.